Mga Hirit ni Carlos Part 2
It was February 16, 2007 (Friday) when Carlos invited us to have a drink at the Hilton Hotel. We arrived around 8pm and saw Carlos sitting at the bar. He ordered me a chick drink called Cosmopolitan and excitedly talked to V about a person named 'Mini-me'... I got so curious so I asked.
Julie: Carlos, who's Mini-me?
Carlos: Do you know Thomas A. ?
Julie: Yes. Why do you call him Mini-me?
V: Have you watched Austin Powers?
Julie: Nooo...
Carlos: Do you know Dr. Evil, the one who cloned himself and turns out to be a mini version of him??
Julie: Yes! I've seen that part but I never got to finish the movie. But why 'Mini-me'?
Carlos: Because he wanted to be ME! Hahahahahaha!!!
Carlos: He was once in this project. He always keeps on telling people that he finished the Project Management Program (a course taken by project managers) and that he had a masteral on this or that. One time, he saw his name at the projector during the meeting. He came to me and told me that he wanted his titles (PhD, MA) at the end of his name. I told him, 'Ohhhh, I don't think so!' He said, 'why not??!' Well, because it is something that you don't need to brag about!
Carlos: But now he's gone, he got kicked out of the project. Behavioural training, social interaction, cultural acceptance and humility are things that you won't get from taking those project management courses. It's something that you'll learn through experience. When he was still part of the project, Mini-me told me 'Carlos, you're crazy. You're always following the orders of Mary (the client). And you don't have the balls to tell her that she's crazy..' So I told him, 'Yes! You're right! I don't have the balls to tell her that. Do you want to tell her?' He said yes and went up to Mary and told her that she's crazy!! In the client's face!! He told Mary that she's crazy!!! So Mary told me that Mini-me should be kicked out of the project. I said 'Ok! You got it! He's gone!'
Carlos: I told Mini-me, 'I'm crazy! I admit it! But I'm not stupid. You told the client that she's crazy, so you're out of the project. Are you happy now? (*smirk).' Then he realized that I was right.
Carlos: I've lived on a lot of places all over the world because of the different projects that I've handled so I pretty much understand the mind of a client. I've lived in China, in Europe, in India...
Julie: India? How long have you been there?
Carlos: About a year. It was a horrible experience... I never had s** for a year!
Julie: Hahahaha, I can imagine..
Carlos: Ohh, you can NEVER imagine! You can never imagine!
Carlos: I've also learned not to mess up with your boss. One time, my boss Mark Black and I went to Argentina. (note: Carlos is Spanish).. So I treat him to this restaurant and I ordered the food for us to let him try some new things. Soooo, I let him eat the cow intestines but I didn't tell him they are cow intestines!! When I asked him how the food was, he said, 'Carlos, they kinda taste like shit..' I told him, 'that's what it is!' He got so pissed off and told me he'll get back to me someday and that I should experience how it feels like to be in a place where you don't know the language.
Carlos: And then a project opened in China. And they were deciding on who among the project directors should be sent there. Mark Black told them that he thinks I am most fitted to be sent in China. 'Mark, I don't know Chinese! Are you doing this because remember when we were in Argentina, I made you eat the cow intestines?' Mark said, 'now you'll know how it feels like to be in a foreign country with a different language, heheheh'....
Carlos: Off I went to China. It was really hard because I don't know the language!!! I have a translator, a young Chinese girl. I asked her to go shopping with me during the weekend coz it's hard to buy things there!! All are in Chinese characters! But my translator refused coz her boyfriend is jealous and her parents are very strict. I told her, 'then bring your boyfriend with you! Let's go shopping together! You'll still get paid coz you're working, you're my translator!' She still said no. So I went shopping by myself and took a cab, and the meter is in Chinese so I just took out all my money and showed it to the driver and he happily counted and picked up anything...And Oh my goodness, preparing my expense claims is a nightmare!! Dinner?? I put on $40 and just about anything coz I don't know how much I spent! Then SPL called me and asked 'how do I know that you spent $40 for dinner?' I told her, 'You don't!! I don't either!!!!'
Carlos: Then it always take me so lonnnggg to prepare my resource plan because when I asked one question 'How many reports are left?' The translator will translate my question and she'll go 'abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi', and then the client will answer 'abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi', then the translator will tell me 'Seven......' Oh my Goshh!!!! So, I'll ask another question again, 'Which report should be finished first?'....
Translator: Abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi.....
Client: Abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi.....
Then the translator will again turn to me and say 'This one....'
Carlos: Then the SPL again called me because I'm one week late on submitting my resource plan. I told them I'm still working on it. But they said they need it now. So, ok. I sent them my resource plan. Then they called me again and said, 'Carlos, they're in Chinese!'....I told them 'Duh, I'm in China!!! That's what I've been working on! I'm still in the process of translating it!'
Carlos: So remember, never mess up with your boss! They can send you anywhere!
Julie: Carlos, who's Mini-me?
Carlos: Do you know Thomas A. ?
Julie: Yes. Why do you call him Mini-me?
V: Have you watched Austin Powers?
Julie: Nooo...
Carlos: Do you know Dr. Evil, the one who cloned himself and turns out to be a mini version of him??
Julie: Yes! I've seen that part but I never got to finish the movie. But why 'Mini-me'?
Carlos: Because he wanted to be ME! Hahahahahaha!!!
Carlos: He was once in this project. He always keeps on telling people that he finished the Project Management Program (a course taken by project managers) and that he had a masteral on this or that. One time, he saw his name at the projector during the meeting. He came to me and told me that he wanted his titles (PhD, MA) at the end of his name. I told him, 'Ohhhh, I don't think so!' He said, 'why not??!' Well, because it is something that you don't need to brag about!
Carlos: But now he's gone, he got kicked out of the project. Behavioural training, social interaction, cultural acceptance and humility are things that you won't get from taking those project management courses. It's something that you'll learn through experience. When he was still part of the project, Mini-me told me 'Carlos, you're crazy. You're always following the orders of Mary (the client). And you don't have the balls to tell her that she's crazy..' So I told him, 'Yes! You're right! I don't have the balls to tell her that. Do you want to tell her?' He said yes and went up to Mary and told her that she's crazy!! In the client's face!! He told Mary that she's crazy!!! So Mary told me that Mini-me should be kicked out of the project. I said 'Ok! You got it! He's gone!'
Carlos: I told Mini-me, 'I'm crazy! I admit it! But I'm not stupid. You told the client that she's crazy, so you're out of the project. Are you happy now? (*smirk).' Then he realized that I was right.
Carlos: I've lived on a lot of places all over the world because of the different projects that I've handled so I pretty much understand the mind of a client. I've lived in China, in Europe, in India...
Julie: India? How long have you been there?
Carlos: About a year. It was a horrible experience... I never had s** for a year!
Julie: Hahahaha, I can imagine..
Carlos: Ohh, you can NEVER imagine! You can never imagine!
Carlos: I've also learned not to mess up with your boss. One time, my boss Mark Black and I went to Argentina. (note: Carlos is Spanish).. So I treat him to this restaurant and I ordered the food for us to let him try some new things. Soooo, I let him eat the cow intestines but I didn't tell him they are cow intestines!! When I asked him how the food was, he said, 'Carlos, they kinda taste like shit..' I told him, 'that's what it is!' He got so pissed off and told me he'll get back to me someday and that I should experience how it feels like to be in a place where you don't know the language.
Carlos: And then a project opened in China. And they were deciding on who among the project directors should be sent there. Mark Black told them that he thinks I am most fitted to be sent in China. 'Mark, I don't know Chinese! Are you doing this because remember when we were in Argentina, I made you eat the cow intestines?' Mark said, 'now you'll know how it feels like to be in a foreign country with a different language, heheheh'....
Carlos: Off I went to China. It was really hard because I don't know the language!!! I have a translator, a young Chinese girl. I asked her to go shopping with me during the weekend coz it's hard to buy things there!! All are in Chinese characters! But my translator refused coz her boyfriend is jealous and her parents are very strict. I told her, 'then bring your boyfriend with you! Let's go shopping together! You'll still get paid coz you're working, you're my translator!' She still said no. So I went shopping by myself and took a cab, and the meter is in Chinese so I just took out all my money and showed it to the driver and he happily counted and picked up anything...And Oh my goodness, preparing my expense claims is a nightmare!! Dinner?? I put on $40 and just about anything coz I don't know how much I spent! Then SPL called me and asked 'how do I know that you spent $40 for dinner?' I told her, 'You don't!! I don't either!!!!'
Carlos: Then it always take me so lonnnggg to prepare my resource plan because when I asked one question 'How many reports are left?' The translator will translate my question and she'll go 'abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi', and then the client will answer 'abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi', then the translator will tell me 'Seven......' Oh my Goshh!!!! So, I'll ask another question again, 'Which report should be finished first?'....
Translator: Abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi.....
Client: Abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi abadi.....
Then the translator will again turn to me and say 'This one....'
Carlos: Then the SPL again called me because I'm one week late on submitting my resource plan. I told them I'm still working on it. But they said they need it now. So, ok. I sent them my resource plan. Then they called me again and said, 'Carlos, they're in Chinese!'....I told them 'Duh, I'm in China!!! That's what I've been working on! I'm still in the process of translating it!'
Carlos: So remember, never mess up with your boss! They can send you anywhere!
posted by slacker @ 12:21 AM
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